Happy Soul Healthy Ego
Having been isolated for many months due to the virus and, more recently, the fires and smoke here in California, I have had considerable time to think about relationships and the role they play in my life. How I see myself and feel about myself determines the balance and well-being of all of my relationships. Because I learned this a long time ago, my primary focus during this time has been my relationship with myself.
As human beings, we are often led by our ego and I have come to believe that one of the keys to a good life is a healthy, balanced ego. I have heard it said many times over the years that we have to overcome or do away with ego. This approach never resonated with my soul.
Please hear me: I do not have all the answers. However, when talking with teachers I know, love, and trust, I am guided to balance and wholeness. Balanced emotions allow me to embrace life with passion while not being ruled by thoughts or emotions. For example, when I experience deep loss, I can allow myself to grieve until I am finished grieving and not be devastated. In other situations, I can admit that I am disappointed without letting that disappointment drag me into depression, hopelessness, or judgement.
Dealing with the ego is a bit more complex. In a private session with Richard Miller years ago, we spoke of ego getting in the way. He was the first one to clearly say to me that it is a healthy ego we need rather than a banished ego. Have you ever known someone with a lack of self-assurance or confidence who is, at the same time, arrogant and controlling? It occurs to me that the ego of this person rises up to hide that lack of awareness of their True Self. It boasts and claims to be in charge to protect the person who feels less adequate than others. There is another possibility for those who feel insecure within themselves, who don't know who they are. The ego can make them fearful of trying something difficult because they might not succeed. This was my issue when I was young. I was taught to be confident and things came to me rather easily through high school. Because of that, I didn't have many opportunities to learn how to carry things through to completion whether I succeeded or not. That began to change in college. When hurdles presented themselves, I felt overwhelmed and tended to quit rather than fail. Rather than being challenged from within to figure it out and find solutions, I gave up because somehow I thought successful people got it right the first time. My ego told me time and time again that I couldn't get it right. It felt safer not to take many risks.
As I have played with this idea of being who my ego says I am, I smile with the realization that my ego has become more balanced as I have practiced yoga and meditation. Just as my emotions are healthier and I embrace life with passionate equanimity, my ego is healthier and tends to be more attuned to my Soul, my True Self. Ego is learning that I am this loving and compassionate being who currently lives in this body-mind but who is not defined by it. Ego is learning that expanded, enlightened awareness is not a threat to its existence. This Awareness is, instead, what allows ego to attune to and be in balance with True Self. The self-image now emerging is based on the truth of who I am.
As my awareness expands, it is supported by an ego getting healthier every day, an ego that "gets me." I am laughing as I type that....is the laughter happiness or is it my ego thinking it has fooled me into feeling I have "arrived" once again??!!
I am grateful for these past 7 months because they have increased my awareness of this human journey I am on. I am more open to receiving inspiration from gifted teachers. We are abundantly blessed with wise teachers who have powerful life experiences they are willing to share.
My invitation to you is this: Maintain an open heart and mind. Allow Divine Love to bring the teachings that you will resonate with so that you can grow into the abundance of your own Soul. This, my brothers and sisters, will bring you peace and joy so that your light will shine whether you are aware of it or not!
Are you wanting more? May I walk with you for awhile?
Contact me with questions, appointment requests, or whatever is on your mind and heart: [email protected] Please consider joining my online meditation group💖
